There are certain songs that just stay with you. Songs that take you back to a particular season of life and remind you of something God taught you along the way. For me, one of those songs is "Gratitude" by Brandon Lake.
As an adult, I've experienced seasons when my asthma was uncontrolled. If you've ever struggled to breathe, you know how frightening that can be. There were months when my rescue inhaler rarely left my side because I was afraid of what might happen if I couldn't catch my breath.
During that season, even singing became difficult. I couldn't hold notes like I wanted to, and I had to stop to take breaths. Sometimes it felt like I barely had enough air to sing at all.
And that bothered me because worship through music has always been meaningful to me. I wanted to sing. I wanted to give God everything I had. Even though I knew I was giving all I physically could, somehow it still felt like it wasn't enough.
Then I heard that part of "Gratitude" about having a lion inside your lungs. Hearing those words when my own lungs felt so weak spoke directly to my heart.
I didn't suddenly have more breath, and my asthma didn't disappear. But something began to change in the way I understood worship. I could give God what I had, even when it felt small, and trust the Holy Spirit to carry what I couldn't.
There was such freedom in that realization. I didn't have to sing louder or hold every note. I didn't have to somehow manufacture the strength I didn't have. I just needed to worship with what I had and trust the Holy Spirit with the rest.
Every time I hear "Gratitude," something stirs within me. It's hard to explain. It's not necessarily excitement or even a feeling of strength. It's more like a renewed confidence in the power of the Holy Spirit living within me.
I remember what it felt like to struggle for breath and to want to give more than I physically could. I also remember what God taught me in those moments: my worship didn't have to stop where my strength ended.
The Holy Spirit was still at work within me, and He still is. I can come to God with what I have, even when all I have is a little breath and a grateful heart.